Certified Coordinated Bride Bindi
Journal Entry #4
Smiles and Walking Down the Aisle
It’s finally here; two years’ worth of planning and the first of our wedding festivities kick off today! It’s true what everyone says, wedding planning is exhausting, but to be honest I barely did the hard work. My fiancé has been deeply invested in making this the day of my dreams and has done so much in his power to see me smile. I couldn’t be more grateful than to know this is whom I’m going to be sharing my life with. When it comes to decision-making it’s always been “what do you like? What do you want?” He’s done, planned and thought of everything I could imagine, and for that, I know for sure that I’m in for such an amazing new chapter.
Looking back, I really can’t believe the guy who used to share his textbook with me in class is the guy I’m now marrying, literally ten years later. When it comes to high school love, people often become immersed in the thought that who they’re dating at 15 will be the same person at 25, but the harsh reality is that’s not true. You have to allow the person you’re with to grow into who they need to be and understand the real world doesn’t care if you’re high school sweethearts, it’s going to hit you with everything it’s got. Since James and I began dating at 16, we had to learn to bend and mold through the changes that life brings, as you grow older. The good thing about this is that we were able to grow together rather than grow apart. Through every new milestone, degree, birthday and more we’ve been at each other’s side, learning, growing, and laughing along the way. It’s never been easy but I guess we make it look like it is judging from the amount of people who complement our relationship. But it’s really been all about compromise. At the end of the day we’ve learned no issue is too large to work past, because in the end we both want the same thing, each other. It’s important to not get hung up on the little speed bumps in your relationship and keep an eye out for the bigger picture. I’m thankful though that through it all we still manage to learn something new about each other every day, and I look forward to learning EVEN MORE about him when we move in together. Unlike many couples who often start the process of living together prior to the wedding, James and I have waited to experience that for the first time after the wedding, so I know for a fact there will be MANY more “first’s” we will get to experience together, like figuring out which side of the bed is mine! Also in the Hindu religion, when it comes to the daughter getting married, she technically is supposed to wait until the wedding day to finally “leave”, and as I’ve mentioned in my previous post, my parents are West Indian and have been super strict so of course they would want me to wait until I’m officially married to move out lol.
My advice to all the soon-to-be brides out there, don’t sweat the small stuff! Things won’t go as planned but stay positive and things will work itself out. James and I learned his wedding band wouldn’t be able to be made 8 days before our wedding ceremony. Can you imagine that? A pretty reputable jewelry store telling you “I’m sorry but it’s impossible to make this ring” (even though you purchased it MONTHS in advance) and leaving you ring less, 8 days before your wedding? You would not believe how crazy we went thinking he would be without a ring but we figured out a backup plan and kept it moving. Those are the things that life is going to throw at you, and you’ll have to just try your best to not get hung up on it. You’re going to have to try your best to not focus on the negative and figure out how to think of the positives. It’s also important to ALWAYS ASK FOR HELP! People are going to give you the “let me know if you need help” line, but seriously, LET THEM HELP! I would not have gotten half the things I got done, if it wasn’t for the help of my friends and family! Don’t think you’re burdening them, because if they genuinely care about you, they wont think twice about the work. And most of all, remember the wedding is a ONE-DAY event (well two in my case) so have conversations with your fiancé that don’t involve wedding talk. I think I would have gone crazy if all James and I spoke about was the wedding. We made sure to have our date nights, we made sure to have fun, to do things non-wedding related. Some weekends we’d set aside time to do wedding errands but other weekends we’d spend drinking Long Island Ice Tea’s at Applebee’s for happy hour lol. It’s so important to have that balance, because if you’re in wedding mode 99% of the time, what will you talk about when you’re married? When the wedding is over, what will your conversations be about?
All in all, the engagement experience for me has been filled with lots of lessons learned and I am so happy to be able to be marrying, literally my BEST friend. Words can’t explain how happy I am to be his wife, and cook him one-pot recipes that I learned from the “Tasty” Facebook page! I’m excited to share this special day with our friends who have stuck it out by our side for ten years, as this day isn’t about JUST us, it’s about them too. They have supported our relationship 100% of the way and it feels great knowing that this is the end result.
Although I’m beyond happy, this day is somewhat bittersweet also because it marks one month since my grandfather passed, he was sick for a while, but with each month that went by I prayed that he would be able to see this day. We had anticipated going to see him right after our Hindu wedding, decked out in our ceremony outfits, mainly because I really couldn’t imagine not having him be a part of the festivities, we were SO close. Sadly, God had other plans, and although he won’t physically get to see us, I know he will be there in spirit, everywhere, hope you enjoy the show Grampy!
I am literally sobbing! That was such a beautiful way to close out your journey with us Bindi. Our stories are very similar, I have the same strict Haitian parents that have the same rules and values. Thank you for your great advices and I wish you the very best!
thank you so much Daphnee 🙂
love you :-*